Kiley Mattson

Looking back at the person I was before my year of service to Missouri FFA, I’ve seen a number of major changes in myself. I’ve grown more confident, I’m better at conversation, I’ve learned resilience, but perhaps the most important thing I’ve learned is how to be courageous. Without courage, I wouldn’t have achieved any of the progress I’ve seen within myself. Throughout the past year, I’ve been asked to conquer challenges that scared me, embracing situations that made me uncomfortable in my abilities. Many times when asked to participate, I wanted to say no. Instead of staying where I was comfortable, I dug down deep and found the courage I needed to march through the fear, get the job done, and grow in the process. 

The word courage comes from the Latin root cor meaning heart. You see, courage is more than not being afraid or being uncomfortable. Courage is acknowledging that you have fear and feel uncomfortable, and then having the heart to face those fears and push through the discomfort in order to grow. It comes from a deeper desire to grow and succeed and prosper as a person. It comes from your heart, your core. 

Life is scary and uncomfortable. Changes will come to disrupt your life, whether good or bad. What’s important to remember is that you have it in you to make it through any and all obstacles. Deep in your heart, you have the courage to stretch your comfort zone, try new things, and grow into the person you’ve always wanted to be. Some days you have to dig deeper than others to find that courage, but it will always be there. So don’t give up! Find courage, and let it fuel your fire to progress and grow throughout your life. 

One of my favorite TV shows is the 90’s classic, Boy Meets World. I love watching the main character Cory and his best friend Shawn get into all kinds of trouble only to be steered straight by one of their teachers/principle, Mr. George Finney. George always has the most wise advice to give these boys when they find themselves with problems they don’t know how to solve. One of my favorite Finney quotes is this: 

“If you let others dictate your behavior, you will never grow as a person.”
– George Finney

We all want to be liked, accepted, part of a group, and oftentimes we let the fear of isolation or rejection influence the ways we act. It’s not always easy to be ourselves when we’re afraid of rejection or ridicule. But life isn’t easy, making the right choices isn’t easy, and growing as a person is NEVER easy. Ease is a luxury that no leader has. Instead, it’s hard work, uncomfortable situations, and vulnerability that help us grow as individuals and leaders. And if we let others dictate our behavior, we won’t get to experience that growth. So follow the wise direction of Mr. George Finney and don’t be afraid to grow. 

One of the hardest things I’ve had to learn was that everyone’s journey is different, and that’s okay. As the youngest of four, I struggled with understanding the difference between looking up to my sisters and trying to be them. I compared my journey to theirs and thought that if my road didn’t look exactly like theirs then I was a failure. I had to get good grades like they did, I had to be good at sports like they were, I had to be as popular as they were or else I wasn’t anyone of worth. I compared my abilities, talents, and personality to those of my sisters and seemed to always come up short. I thought this was the truth, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. It wasn’t until I read a quote in a book that I started to understand that I didn’t need or even want to be exactly like my sisters because that just wasn’t who I was. The quote in question was from the Bhagavad Gita and it said, “It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else’s life with perfection.” 

After reading that, I couldn’t stop thinking about how I was living an imitation of my sisters because I was scared of being myself, being different. I was scared that if my journey didn’t look like my sisters’ then I was a failure. I finally realized that I am my own amazing person with my own amazing journey. My failures and successes don’t look the same as any of my sisters and theirs don’t look the same as mine, but we still have our own failures and successes. When I stopped comparing my journey with theirs, I began to enjoy my life more. Don’t be like me. Don’t waste your time trying to be someone else. Be who you are with all your heart and enjoy this life God has blessed you with.